Supercommunicators: How to Unlock the Secret Language of Connection
Charles Duhigg
From the New York Times bestselling author of The Power of Habit, a fascinating exploration of what makes conversations work, and how we can all learn to be supercommunicators at work and in life. Come inside a jury room as one juror leads a starkly divided room to consensus. Join a young CIA officer as he recruits a reluctant foreign agent. more
320 pages, Hardcover
First published Random House
4.12
Rating
158
Ratings
73
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Charles Duhigg
34 books 5132 followers
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This is my first book by Charles Duhigg. I have heard so much about his previous books around adjusting your habits to reach your goals. For years I have obsessively read business books and articles related to my field of work. Communication has always been pivotal in reaching goals in a corporate environment. This book is elaborating the various communication styles based on the following three elements: "What´s this really about. more
I never really read books that I would consider "self-help", but this title spoke to me, and I grabbed it on NetGalley. Duhigg's advice on how to connect with others seems pretty straightforward and in some ways, intuitive, but he uses fascinating examples to illuminate the lessons. I like case studies, and Duhigg doesn't boil them down to the point where all you get is a synopsis. These cases really do show the reader the pitfalls of not being more conscious, more thoughtful about how you communicate. I found the afterward to be the best part of this book. more
Supercommunicators is a fascinating exposition on the art of communicating well. From the first page, the book is both informative and entertaining as Charles Duhigg weaves storytelling and science to build the case for effective communication. The book opens with the explanation that within every conversation is three distinct discussions that move fluidly from one to the next: analytical, emotional, and identity based. In the following chapters, he walks the reader through conversational pitfalls, and then he breaks down how to recognize each type of conversation and tips on navigating that discussion thoughtfully. In order to drive the points home in each chapter, he chooses hot button topics affecting the world today to demonstrate how a super communicator might engage in tricky discussions without alienating- these topics include: gun control, vaccines, political party, race and prejudice, parenting minefields, and one very fascinating Birds Eye view into a jury room discussion, etc. more
I am not a supercommunicator but would love to be. Duhigg, author of The Power of Habit, makes the case in his new book that we can all learn to be one, and he attempts to show us how. The book is based on the premise that there are three conversations (and mindsets) and four rules. The three conversations are: a) what's this really about (decision-making mindset), b) how do we feel (emotional mindset), and c) who are we (social mindset). And the four rules are: 1) pay attention to what kind of conversation is occurring; 2) share your goals, and ask what others are seeking; 3) ask about others' feelings and share your own; and 4) explore if identities are important to this discussion. more
“whether we call it love, or friendship, or simply having a great conversation, achieving connection—authentic, meaningful connection—is the most important thing in life. ”This is a really insightful book on how we can better communicate with others. Duhigg uses lots of research studies and real life examples from places like Netflix, a jury room, The Big Bang Theory, NASA, and the CIA to show the principles in action. By looking at typically controversial conversations on topics like gun control, vaccines, and race, we can see how employing these principles really changes the dialogue and allows people who normally disagree to understand each other and bring meaningful connection where we desperately need it. With the increase of internet use we see a decrease in civil discourse. more
Disclosure: I read this as an ARC from NetGalley. I enjoyed this book enough, the pacing was decent and the text as a whole was engaging. I particularly appreciated the inclusion of several different stories which made this feel less like a dry non-fiction and more like a collection of personal stories tied together with an overarching theme and line of advice. Additionally, the various statistics and data from published research papers woven into the chapters made the advice feel more legitimate and useful to me (as a scientist I appreciate this kind of background of evidence). The idea of a "supercommunicator" isn't something new. more
Synopsis: Supercommunicators looks at what makes some people exceptional at connecting with others. Executives, politicians, community leaders, and CIA operatives were all interviewed and highlighted in Supercommunicators to prove that communication is more about listening and making others feel heard rather than speaking. Why does this book beguile. After his book, The Power of Habit, I was incredibly excited to get Duhigg's’ latest book as an ARC. I love learning about communication and ways to communicate better and more effectively. more
This book is gripping from the beginning (not something I usually say about a HOW TO book). And it is full of useful, new-to-me tips for how to better communicate with those we encounter. I also found that it was interesting to learn how others might be using their communication skills to persuade me to action--I hope I remember to put this new counter-skill to good use. Pacing was fantastic, not too many stories and not too much education but a great mix at just the right points. I can't wait to get the audio and listen, and really seal in the practicalities of a worthy goal: being a super-communicator. more
I've been a fan of Charles Duhigg since his book The Power of Habit. It was an instant favorite, so of course I requested this book as soon as I saw it, and it did not disappoint. I wasn't even interested in the topic initially but knew that Duhigg's compelling writing would draw me in and teach me something new, and I was right. He provided so many interesting anecdotes, from the FBI to anti-vaxxers, and so many interesting psychological studies, that this book was hard to put down. more
This book not only gave the science behind communication techniques but also used real life examples of what happens when you do, or don't, communicate well and how you can make adjustments to improve. There are also application sections after each topic that share ways to use the techniques and apply them to real life. It was a pretty easy read with stories, scientific study information, and real life application. more
Overall this was good, it just took me forever to read because I kept getting a little bored reading it. There isn’t anything in here I didn’t already know, although the examples were interesting. The chapters were also a little too long and made it hard to commit to reading through onto the next one. more
I've enjoyed Duhigg's prior books (The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business most specifically), and I also enjoyed Supercommunicators. Like many of Duhigg's works, this book is borne out of his desire to improve his own communication skills to build stronger, deeper, and more durable relationships with others. "How to be a better communicator" in general is a very oversaturated topic in self-development books with many of the same pieces of general advice and well-known anecdotes and studies recounted repeatedly, but I appreciated Duhigg's approach in conducting robust interviews and research on the topic to bring a fresh perspective on the topic. Further reading:How to Know a Person: The Art of Seeing Others Deeply and Being Deeply Seen by David Brooks (2023) -- I kept being reminded of this book as I read Supercommunicators; lots of subject matter overlapThe Good Life: Lessons from the World's Longest Scientific Study of Happiness by Robert Waldinger and Marc Schulz - cited quite a bit in this work. more
I really enjoyed reading this book. It was well written and I connected with a lot of the stories he shared. One of the stories was about a being on a jury which was fascinating to see how that played out. Another one was the writers working to get The Big Bang Theory show to work with the concept of the show they wanted. I was interested in the stories about the doctor and vaccine conversations and lastly the story about Netflix and it's company culture. more
I loved Charles Duhigg's The Power of Habit and Smarter, Faster, Better, so I was so excited to see his new book. Supercommunicators did not disappoint. Supercommunicators deals with having difficult conversations and creating connection between people. Each conversation has these elements: What's this really about, how do we feel, and who are we. I love Duhigg's story telling style of combining research and real-life examples to drive home the point. more
I was provided an ARC of this book through NetGalley and am providing my honest opinion about the book. First, I love Duhigg's work so I was geeked about this title coming out. What I will say is that this one feels a bit like a cross between a negotiation business book and an explanation of where we stumble so much in relationships. With the ease of an award-winning journalist, Duhigg walks us through the process of identifying the missing piece in our conversational puzzle - "what type of conversation are each of us actually having. " in order to help us bring back a real understanding of others so we can rebuild relationships. more
Thank you to both #NetGalley and Random House Publishing Group/Random House for providing me an advance copy of Charles Duhigg latest #nonfiction work, Supercommunicators: How to Unlock the Secret Language of Connection, in exchange for an honest review. In a world where empathy and the spoken word are increasingly being eroded by sterile technologies and impersonal modes of communication, #Supercommunicators reminds readers about the importance of maintaining relationships, honing social skills, and preserving personalization. The book alternates between offering practical guidance and demonstrating how that guidance applies using real life anecdotes from across various industries, ranging from the medical community to major corporations. The anecdotes keep the subject matter entertaining and educate the reader about studies they might not have known otherwise. The one point that I wish the book focused on more is how to become a “supercommunicator” online. more
4. 5 — Not sure if I picked this book up to assess my level of communication, learn tips for improvement, better understand communication discourse, or enjoy the appealing cover art. Perhaps it was a little of all which Duhigg made me realize as I made my way through this instructive & insightful look into how humans connect through transformational communication. Written in an easily accessible tone & chock-full of anecdotes from various walks of life, this exploration into communication & connection contains many nuggets of wisdom. I’m an educational technology professional working in a school system that has been doing lots of thinking around the concept of hospitality. more
Duhigg has a writing style that works incredibly well for me. He's able to articulate crucial points clearly and provide entertaining examples. Somehow, he manages to give research and self-help books a "what happens next" element that keeps me turning pages at an incredible rate. As far as the topics of this book, often they seemed obvious or common sense. But as I get older, I realize common sense isn't all that common. more
A perfectly fine book about how to communicate effectively. I've always considered myself as scoring fairly highly on great communication scale but this book gave some interesting anecdotes and good advice on managing conversations to make them as effective as possible. The stat that stuck in my mind was that when 2 unknown people were put together and asked set questions to each other for an hour, over 50% of them kept in touch afterwards, having formed a deep connection due to their asking of the right sort of questions about how they felt about particular things and sharing their experiences. I also really liked hearing about the football teams that merged Christian and Muslim players and how quickly the players assimilated and grew friendships despite previous distrust of each other and prejudices. I have put some of these techniques into practise as a result of reading this book and already found out some things about someone from asking better questions rather than "how long did it take you to get here. more
I’m a Communication major in uni so of course I gravitated towards this book. I was afraid it would be redundant and I’d end up DNFing but it was incredibly interesting and insightful, and I think anyone who is interested in human social behavior, communication (obviously), and improving their connections with others would really enjoy this book. I really think anyone from a socially anxious young adult like me to a business person navigating negotiations and introductions would find something useful from Supercommunicators. This is my area of interest but I also enjoyed the anecdotes, especially the Big Bang Theory bit. I will say, the one thing that irked me was the use of the R slur during the Netflix section. more
I quite enjoyed reading this book about how to become a supercommunicator. I'm not a huge self-help book fan, but I found this one to be well worth the read. We all communicate and want to be able to communicate to the best of our abilities, but sometimes it's hard to know how to do that. This book presents three questions for us to use/solve when approaching a conversation. They are: What's this really about. more
Thank you thank you thank you to NetGalley for this advanced copy. BLOWN AWAY by this book and can not wait to get my hands on the physcial copy so I can read it again and underline and make notes. I consider myself to be an excellent communicator and this book taught me so much about why I feel that way, and it helped me understand so much about what I am already doing well and what I can do to become an even better communicators. In this day and age, we are forgetting how to effectively CONNECT and COMMUNICATE with each other. Social media has had a huge effect on all of us, but we still need to operate in this world by communicating with other humans around us. more
What's the big idea and/or unique approach of this book. Some people connect with others more deeply, resulting in real communication and remarkable moments. And, the author says, there are some learnable skills that we can get from studying these "supercommunicators. "Unfortunately, the book didn't spend much time with these people. It just covered standard stuff on how to communicate and connect, like listening skills, including matching the emotional affect of the person you're talking to, and creating a safe space for people to be different. more
Solid book on communications. I think some of the book overlaps to concepts mentioned in Never Split The Difference (highly recommended). For example, asking deliberate questions then asking the person you're talking to "What I heard was. " to mirror their emotions and in order to gain understanding on how that person feels. ultimately to connect with the person. more
This book was fantastic. I learned a lot from this, especially about the different TYPES of conversations. I had no idea that this was a huge part of how miscommunication happens. I tend to me a person who has a more emotional conversation, and my husband is more logical. I always felt like he wasn't listening to me or understanding me. more
There is possibly no book we need more than SUPERCOMMUNICATORS by Charles Duhigg. With spare, enjoyable prose and terrific stories, Duhigg shares the means and methods by which the best communicators among us connect, ultimately uniting individuals in sharing a moment, a relationship, and possibly changing the world one conversation at a time. Ridiculously, stratospheric praise. I think not. Having read his well-written book with heart-pounding mind shifts, I have used his suggestions to great effect. more
I think the premise of this book and much of the information contained it was very important and helpful. The idea of supercommunicators and the skills and practices that make them was intuitive in a sense, but Duhigg also presented new insights in this regard. I also liked his ideas of the three different types of conversations and how to best communicate in each was different. All that being said, I think for at least 2/3 of this book, I would rate it very highly. However, for the final third or so I felt like the book took on subject matter and delved into areas of communication that have been covered better in other books that I have read. more
I loved this book. Charles Duhigg is so good at combining useful information with compelling anecdotes. In Supercommunicators, he examines the different types of conversations we have (practical, emotional, and social) and explains how we can more effectively communicate with each other by recognizing what type of conversation we're having. For example, if I think we're having an emotional conversation and you think we're having a practical one, we're not going to get very far. Duhigg gives concrete examples of each type of conversation and explains how we can become supercommunicators by recognizing and matching each type of conversation. more
I imagine the world would be a much better place if everyone was required to read this book. In Supercommunicators, Charles Duhigg takes us through chapter after chapter of learning the art of communication in all situations, from romantic relationships to workplace conversations, to the difficult conversations with those we know and with strangers. I especially loved the chapter about learning to communicate with others that don't share your beliefs in a constructive way where both sides feel heard, rather than devolving into a shouting match or loss of friendships, as we see so often in today's volatile online world. I took so many notes and have learned many tools on how to have deeper, more meaningful conversations with everyone I come in contact with. This book will definitely be a reread for me. more
This was my first Charles Duhigg book, so I wasn't sure what to expect, but I was pleasantly surprised given my history with these sorts of "how to" books. Duhigg is expert at dissecting complex topics and distilling them into actionable insights, seamlessly blending engaging anecdotes with well-researched principles. From dissecting successful public speakers to decoding the strategies of influential leaders. Duhigg draws on a wide array of examples, making the content relatable and applicable to diverse audiences. It is easily readable, entertaining, and approachable. more