How Smart People Handle Difficult People

Difficult people defy logic. They create unnecessary complexity, strife and worst of all stress.

90 % of top performers are skilled at managing their emotions in times of stress in order to remain calm and in control. They have well-honed coping strategies that they employ to keep difficult people at bay.

People often feel pressure to listen to complainers because they don’t want to be seen as callous or rude.

Avoid this by setting limits and distancing yourself when necessary. Ask complainers how they intend to fix the problem. They will either quiet down or redirect the conversation in a productive direction.

Difficult people drive you crazy because their behavior is so irrational. 

Distance yourself from them emotionally and approach your interactions like they’re a science project (or you’re their shrink). You don’t need to respond to the emotional chaos -- only the facts.

Maintaining emotional distance requires awareness. 

Sometimes you’ll find yourself in situations where you’ll need to regroup and choose the best way forward. Don't be afraid to buy yourself some time to do so.

If you set boundaries and decide when and where you’ll engage a difficult person, you can control much of the chaos. 

The only trick is to stick to your guns and keep boundaries in place when the person tries to encroach upon them, which they will.

Smart people know how important it is to live to fight another day, especially when your foe is a toxic individual. 

When you read and respond to your emotions, you’re able to choose your battles wisely and only stand your ground when the time is right.

When it comes to toxic people, fixating on how crazy and difficult they are gives them power over you. 

Focus instead on how you're going to go about handling them. This makes you more effective by putting you in control.

Smart people are unwilling to be bogged down unnecessarily by others’ mistakes, so they let them go quickly and are assertive in protecting themselves from future harm.

There’s nothing wrong with feeling bad about how someone is treating you, but your self-talk (the thoughts you have about your feelings) can either intensify the negativity or help you move past it. 

Avoid negative self-talk at all costs.

Sleep deprivation raises stress hormone levels on its own, even without a stressor present. 

A good night’s sleep makes you more positive, creative and proactive in your approach to toxic people, giving you the perspective you need to deal effectively with them.

Everyone has someone at work and/or outside work who is on their team and ready to help them get the best from a difficult situation. Identify these individuals in your life and make an effort to seek their insight and assistance when you need it. Something as simple as explaining the situation can lead to a new perspective.